After yesterday’s breathe your breath, meet-and-greet with about a thousand people, I have to wait to see if I start feeling all Covid-19. I hope not. Still, if my fate is written that way, I’ll be sneaking into the Bajan field hospital without travel insurance. Hopefully too, I’ll be well enough to be like, ‘Can I borrow your wifi code? I have a blog to write.’

If I’m met with resistance, I imagine I can always bore the medical staff with my never-ending explanation of my blog. 500-words a day, every day, etcetera. It’ll be enough to send them screaming towards the oxygen bottles.

Scott and I learnt interesting things about Barbados during the last day that supermarkets were open.

1. The first was that it’s perfectly acceptable to leave your place in the queue, go and lounge in the shade and come back whenever you’re feeling strong enough. Even if it’s hours later. Not judging. Ha! People here are truly tolerant and kind.
2. It’s also acceptable for your family and friends to join you in the queue, even if you’re already squashed like sardines in a pair of knickers two sizes too small. Not so good.
3. The police here are amazing bear-huggers. The way that police officer grabbed that fleeing woman outside Jordan’s and the way her long purple plaited extensions whipped through the air when she flew into the back of the police van. Not saying it was right or anything. We all watched it.
4. People really yell in the above circumstance. The crowd went wild at the sight of the altercation.
5. Altercations are also another perfectly good reason for people to leave their position in the queue and run to watch – and film what’s going on. And then, just when Scott and I thought we’d gained a whole ten feet of queueing room ahead of us, everyone came back to their original positions. Some new people even arrived. Friends and family. Oof.
6. Entering a supermarket, after waiting seven hours to get inside, is a truly euphoric moment. Overwhelming even. I almost didn’t want to shop anymore. There were eyes watering by the parmesan. I bought some.

Lulu just reminded me of another early coronavirus meme – when the virus was first spreading to Europe. It goes like this: People with the flu: ‘Oh, I’m so ill, I just want to stay in bed and not see anyone. People with coronavirus: ‘I just want to travel the world, see everything, meet people.’

Still makes me giggle. Crazy times, but so many good jokes. Is this proof that these things always come together? Jokes and disaster are apples and cheese. Makes no sense, but it still tastes good. Until you lose your sense of taste of course. Happens in 60% of cases.

How are some people are badly affected by this virus and some people aren’t? Even allowing for the typical underlying health and age-related factors. Is the variation of symptoms down to viral load or genetic pre-determination? Standing in a queue with these beautiful Bajans is suddenly dangerous. Nothing makes sense.